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To Officer Christian Calderon - police partner of Officer Luis Huesca

GOLD STAR HEART

You may not be a direct relative 
to Officer Luis Huesca 
to be part of his Gold Star Family -
but you being his police partner 
have now a Gold Star Heart! 
because you have become 
the best partner battle buddy 
to ever mourn him that could ever be!  Out of the whole Chicago -
of anyone who could have been chosen 
to be his police partner so true - - it was you! - out of the so many - you! 
to be the trusted at his side, 
to battle through together 
all kinds of crime! 
and now you to mourn him. 
You are still the very best in many ways to be so severely tried! for no matter how hard you have now 
so equally yet courageously cried!  And it is your great mission! 
your's alone!
And nobody can or should try to make you hurry 
with how you mourn. 
Nobody should say, "Enough now!• with that grief!" 
for this great honor is truly prayer 
to your very brother - Luis!  For your grief-filled candle soul 
is now gleaming out all the heart of you - whole! 
in lights to the heavens 'where he be!' 
until he glows forth - in his mourning for you too! 
- where ever he goes among the stars of heaven
so gracefully. But you are the heart now 
that had to courageously exchange all your work together 
for his soul - real soul entrusted now to you! 
to carry in more than memory now 
but in honor of him, in prayer for him 
and for more than years and days . . . 
for you to shield him in. his transition 
as he the same right now 
shields the grief affecting you 
- as hours of sadness pass from you both
somehow, somewhere away ...

You are maybe not part of that Gold Star Family

- but you are the Gold Star Heart true brother
still in deep mission with him
as ever as could be!
You are entrusted with the soul of him to hold
For it is you still his true friend in dependable heart lights of gold! You are the vigil light for him, before him
You are the light illuminating before his memory
but before the real him!
For you hold his living soul
pressed in your very own
like The Shroud of Turin
- constantly living as he be!
- And he stands also right before you
in the Chicago midnight streets
as a spirit, a vision, a protector,
a reality
at your trembling City of Chicago heartbeats.
Oh Gold Star Heart! of a different family! You are only left 
carrying his soul 
closer than your very own! 
on all future Chicago beats ... 
- as he says "Brother! Bro!
and I've got yours -your soul! -and your back! through whatever danger not only you
- but we together still go!".
"My own Huesca family's burden is horrible now more than the old Chicago saying -
'More than the law will allow!'. 
- But brother there's still moments ahead in Chicago where I have to see you through
- carry you! -soul for soul!
just as you carry me too!".
So, Officer Calderon, you are the best officer 
who could mourn for Officer Huesca -for him alone! Only you would do it in a way 
that touches him so! 
-and touches God so constantly ...
As the blue mantle of Mary
touches the blue, blue sky -
your grieving friendship
is seen and heard by God unceasingly! You ca.1 cry or scream -
and suddenly that night 
Officer Luis is in your dream and he is all right! You can think what organization 
you can try to start in his name 
- and still day by day nothing is the same.
You know he was shot - but didn't some stray hit you too?
- for how that loyal heart of yours - did somehow
get split in two?
Ah such grief-filled ups n' downs! 
- but enough to shake the passed on
to again cry out loud - "Don't cry! -
for I'm still around!" Yet notice! - He just sat beside you -
in your patrol car! 
"What?" - you say - but felt that swish of him 
just before you'd drive very far away.  And your life is now a brother prayer again 
where ever you are this very day!  Why! - his conversation is about to begin! 
But you start so excited in first to him -
"Luis! - a tough call we just got!" 
And you wait eagerly for his reply - from Heaven?  But your new partner answers as he quickly gets in 
- though he might have just sat - on poor Luis again! "Yes! Chris! we've just got to move!
Siren - o.k. with you?
For down this street and we're really near!
Those crooks now suddenly - have a real lot to fear!" An "Ah!" - only sinks deep from Calderon's heart with "New pa:rtner, did it have to take such a career! to find.out I had a true brother 
- and that this courageous buddy
would soon part! Ah! He was Chicago's courageous son!
He was wonderful, brave - and a lot of fun!".  And the new compassionate officer replied,, 
"- But on all counts so are you! Your great grief is so your own! 
- and his too - from even Heaven's home! You're a bro that went with him
through all dangers
and somehow still does!
- 'Onward in battle!'
is your daily trudge!
Now only trudging through memories
- is no doubt more than enough!
Yes, like battle buddies
from the Revolutionary War
and Civil War buddies I've often read'
- 'till this very moment was begun
and one of you brave ones is dead. Partner Chris - it's just day by day now ' till that day is won again ...
He's with you somehow. - Only believe it!
- I do.
And that's alot to be said!".

"Thanks new partner -
somehow I'll see the way. 
I'm just left only with this big space in a huge place of heart and mind that just does not ever go away! And then I swallow in silence 
as we with siren - drive quickly on 
trying to be my old 'swallow it with silent courage Officer Calderon'! 
- And we hit a bump!
"Oh these lousy Chicago streets!
are truly more than enough!"
- And I feel his soul I carry next to me -that I almost forgot
"Dear brother Luis!
Right at the very heart of me
He's right where again I thought he was not!"
Right at my Gold Star Heart! 
He's bumped! - living in more than his memory! 
- Ah leave it to him!
He's in visions, dreams - and reality!
All over again! - we're on a call! - just him n' me!
- And I'm holding you bro-soul Luis!", 
- is all I can say so quietly ...
"Stay safe now -
for we're driving faster on this call away!
Yes - come along!
For it's just another crime-filled normal Chicago day! 
in this 'My kind-a town!' today!" "Oh my 'Why did I take this job? 
- and there he is!
--- a living soul searching after me!
with a bump on the street!
'till I remember once more,
'till again I hold him as he lives!
braver than any danger as can be!"
"And I hear his "Hey brother! Hey bro! 
Don't you know? - to you my way is clear! 
- where ever we go"
And calls like this one will be all right. You've got nothing to fear:
For you hold my soul Chistopher Calderon
- and I am so so near:!
Each sunny Chicago day or treacherous night! I am here.".
And "That's the way . . . ", 
I softly continue on to myself and to my new partner 
as we park near a two flat with family problem 
and a hide-out crook and possible drug dealing there. 
- and that dog out front with the empty water dish
barking and running 
and giving my new partner quite the scare!  

But only out of me comes "Luis is here!" 
- thanks to Chicago streets and his own very high energy!
- right at my heart now here.
Dogs are no problem. - Luis liked all dogs. 
See, - that dog is now calm! 
for Luis is here! 
in his own special policeman prayer! 
following us with his dog-loving, crook-catching 
protective-self all along anywhere! 

May 3, 2024
By Diane Klima